The mind and music, the lamb and the lion

It's hard for me to move from album to album of an artist if I really like a certain album and I think I may have figured out why. See, usually when a song or an album stays with me, it's due to the moment that I'm stuck in when I was or am listening to them. The mind and music are simply tied together.

Melodies spark neurons, which trigger memories, which then floods my head with remnants of what was. It's sort of like walking down the street, or through the mall and you catch a scent that reminds you of someone you once loved.

My feelings on Loney, Noir by Loney Dear will never change. I'll always remember sitting on a wooden floor of a house built in the 1920's with no furniture around me trying to let go of a state of mind that I couldn't accept but couldn't deny. Those songs by no means answered any of my prayers. My demons were as violent as ever, but while I was inside of these songs for 34 minutes, my wounds were soothed and cooled. I haven't bought an album of his since. I haven't wanted to.

When things comfort you, you don't want to find them as changed, because that would mean that time has moved on and the comfort may be gone. I've always had a hard time dealing with the progression of time. I would go as far to say that I've been bound by the "what if" and "should have's" when the simple truth is that they no longer exist. Whatever moments I should have seized when they were presented no longer live. Their ghosts beckon me to be ready, as not to create more ghosts of minutes past. Maybe that's why memories can ring louder than bombs. And maybe that's why they can bring people to accomplish the greatest task we have at hand.

I love the comfort of those moments that the songs bring, but those moments are on display, like relics in a museum and that comfort a brief asylum. Time continues it's march in the figure eight of eternity, but I won't be making the return trip. The comfort is good as a reminder, good as rest, but by no means the end of the journey. They help you get back up. They [should] turn you from lamb into lion.

Man, blogs are weird and I run a venue now

Things have been very interesting in the last few months.

I lost my job in the music industry only to end up working for a country music artist. I now work at a winery in Franklin that is co-owned by one Kix Brooks. How very strange indeed. What's even more strange is when he comes in and asks me how I'm doing (in my head, I used to go "EEP!"). I'm sure the name tag on my shirt helps him remember who I am, but that's fine ("EEP!"). The vineyard is a laid back place that involves some outside work, some bar tending and schmoozing and also some live music happenings. I'd be lyin' if I didn't say I really enjoyed it, but I realize that it's only a temporary spot. Not wanting to get too comfortable in what I'm doing there.

Sometimes the work is great, sometimes the work is just below average. I think part of my view on that is the 40 plus minutes that I drive to get to work. That is a little bit of a stinker, but that's alright.

It's a Brite spot in a Darkroom

I also managed to some how fall into managing a venue. I can't express how completely excited I am about this. I've got the first weekend booked and am currently finishing up rest of the month. I've never worked with artists in this capacity before though. I guess I say that because they get real fickle about playing. I realize that it's name recognition of the venue, but at the same time, people know you when you play, not when you sit around and don't. Sometimes I think it's something that artists should do (working on all sides of their profession) so they can see how much of a pain in the ass it can be to get it done. I'm pretty sure that would eliminate the whining that some of them do. The venue itself is a small room with high ceilings and a kick ass sound set up. The capacity is around 70 people or about 60 with chairs (I think). It's part of an open mall area in Nashville called Edgehill Village (this is for my out of state friends). The bathrooms are just down around the corner and there's no bar, but I'll probably bring refreshments that people can donate to if they want. I have a good attitude about it in general. I can't wait to see if I can get this thing off the ground.

I like to wear my state

So, I've bought a domain name for my t-shirts. I'm pretty stoked about it but I'm sure that not a lot of people knew that I was into the idea of making t-shirts. Right now I've got two designs that are up and going and will be shown off soon. I'd like to have seven by the time I launch the website. It's called 9th Gen, an homage to the nine (probably) generations of my family that have lived in Texas. The idea is that it's going to be Texas themed apparel that appeals to non-Texans, which I think is some percentage of the U.S. nation. It's fun so far, but I haven't quite gotten the hang of inspiration yet. While I'm waiting on that, I'm designing my logo. It's simple and I'll show it off eventually too.

The wind up

Music season is starting in Music City, USA. I'm excited. I am quite possibly on the verge of taking my career seriously. By that I mean that I have sunk money into an online distribution of the album, I have t-shirts being made and I'm trying to make myself get down on a seat and make a tour schedule.

The only thing that's holding me back are those pesky student loans. Perhaps I could file for deferment. That would be grand. After I make my alleged millions, I could pay off those financial leeches (of course, after buying my dad his 1967 Stingray).

Music

Madi Diaz, anyone? I need to buy her album Ten Gun Salute, but for now, I've got two singles "Let's Go" and "Love Me Now". Both wonderful allowances into the world of construction, composition and melody. I just bought "Love Me Now" and it's currently on it's 8th play.

Also, Mikky Ekko. Holy smokes, kid. Your pipes are beautiful. Get it going!!

work

My tenure at the Nashville Children's Theatre comes to a close on Saturday and then hopefully I'll be picked up by the Nashville Ballet for their production of "A Midsummer Night's Dream". How grand that would be! Totally beats an office job. Speaking of which, there is the opportunity that I could land a pretty sweet one. Sounds to good to be true, but if it's true, then I can pay my student loans off in a year, paving the way for a possible return to school in three years for law school.

Location, location, location

Looking for a new place. The ol' lease is up at the end of May/beginning of June. We'll see how that goes. I know of one nest that I can definitely land in. Other than that, it's somewhat of a free for all. We'll see.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 (cliche, but deal with it)